Parents: How you too can graduate with honors from Mitchell College

1. After the acceptance letter arrives, but before the bags are packed, sit down with your son or daughter and talk about tough situations that are likely to come up over the year. Help your child visualize potential areas of difficulty and solutions to roommate problems, drug and alcohol issues, falling behind in class work, failing a test etc. And then spend some time negotiating with them about how you are going to help them or not help them through it.
2. Practice the long view. Take an elderly relative or an older person in your community to lunch and talk with them about the obstacles they have had to overcome in their lives. Celebrate the fact that your student will have obstacles to overcome, and the fact that he or she can overcome them. This is what is called “resilience”.
3. Practice patience: Your child will need plenty of time to get things right in this new place. From pink laundry to missed classes to losing the dorm fob or failing a class- your student will make mistakes. He or she is college material so they will learn from their mistakes- if you let them. Keep the old cliché in the front of your mind- that every failure is an opportunity for growth.
4. Reward mistakes with a patient and calm response. This is the most teachable moment! Help your student problem solve but DO NOT solve the problem for him or her. At some level, when YOU solve the problem you are giving the message to your student that THEY cannot solve the problem.
5. Your student has LRC Specialists who are very kind and very knowledgeable. The Specialists will help, but only if your student talks to him or her. Woody Allen said it best when he said,” 80% of success is showing up”. Support your student by problem solving with them, not interfering.
6. Know your student’s warning signs that she or he is feeling ill or overwhelmed and needs additional resources. Actively support your student going to the Health Center on Mitchell campus for medical or psychological help. Give them the number for the Director of the Health Center directly if needed.
7. Attend parents’ weekend! Parents of LRC students have the wonderful opportunity to meet the LRC Specialists staff. You will learn a tremendous amount about the caring and skilled professionals working with your student.
8. Praise all your student’s successes, attempts at success and thoughts about being successful. But remember to keep it specific and genuine. Blanket praise does not mean much to anyone. You can do it!
9. Listen closely and support your student as they deal with the inevitable difficulties of college life. Be ready to help with problem solving, if they want your help. Be ready to bite your tongue if they want to figure it out on their own.
10. Remember to reward yourself and family members who help you deal with the ups and downs of your student’s life. At graduation, you can give yourself your own well deserved diploma! Be sure to frame it- you earned it!